Day #4 of 21

As this project rolls along I am reminded how little goals can be the foundation for bigger goals. I like to write my goals down in long, detailed lists. Since I am a confirmed dreamer, I am an expert at listing things to do and then when I do nothing on the list (which is my typical MO), I re-list them in a different order for the next week.

An example of this is my 2008 New Years Resolution list… I thought through all the things I wanted to do, and this time with great urgency. I will lose weight, reduce my debt and publish my writing. And this time I swore it would be different! Until I went into my filing cabinet to see what I had written for 2007 and 2006. Yep, the exact same things. No doubt I was high on some very good herb and a bottle of wine. All three years.

So here we are, day #4 of 21… and still staying the course. I kept my list very short for today. Don’t drink, smoke a joint, or ingest any other form of illegal recreation. So far, so good.

One benefit I thought of today is how much money I am saving. By now, I am certain two bottles of wine would have been sacrificed. Savings: $20. OK, so I buy cheap wine.

Day #3 of 21

So today was also full of the typical reasons to indulge… but overall a very good day. My work went well, my youngest daughter solved some of her challenges, my oldest daughter had a great day with her freelance writing, my son was preparing for his last trip before fatherhood and my wife had a great day at work… which gave me a great reason to celebrate, so we went out to dinner.

‘Can I get you anything to drink?’ asked the waiter.

‘Wow,’ I thought to myself, and a few seconds later said, ‘lemonade please’. And that was that. Although a glass of red wine would have gone down nice with a steak, lemonade was just fine.

And then we watched a special on Randy Pausch, one of the finest humans ever to grace this planet, and between tears, reached for a cold one. But I stopped long enough to think about it and instead grabbed a glass of water, which was just as satisfying.

So here I am for the third night in a row without having ingested any happy stuff. For me, quite an accomplishment, really.

Day #2 of 21

Although this is only Day #2 of my little experiment, I have already experienced two separate temptations. Satan is indeed alive and well.

One, generated by stress and worry over a client’s longevity, had me thinking about a nice Cabernet sitting in a glass within my reach on my desk. That one glass would have been followed by another, and then another, until the bottle was almost empty, and then I would have finished it, justified with the thought that good wine should never be wasted.

The next enticement was created by a family matter… it had me reaching for a cold, frothy beer sitting in my fridge. That beer would have gone down soooo easily and of course, been followed within 2 minutes by at least 2 more.

But each episode was squelched by a little voice in my head, who I am finally listening to. The voice said, ‘think about your little 21 day mission’. And then I thought how unhappy I would be —but not surprised— if I had succumbed to these seductive, scantily clad sirens of happiness.

So today went well, at least as well as a Day #2 should go. However, it does illustrate the automatic nature of my cravings, and how impulse will rule if you let it. When thoughtful, I reached for water or a root beer, which satisfied me.

So Day #2 passed without incident… not bad for a Monday.

So here we are headed into Day #3… I’ll let you know how it goes.

Day #1 of 21

This is Day #1 for me. All the other days I’ve experienced are gone. Finished. Fini. But today is right here… in my hands, my eyes.

I think I have abused this wonderful mind, spirit and body I live in. It has been driven like a mountain bike on hot asphalt, instead of the high performance vehicle it is. OK, and I’ve also had a blast.

Today my machine will be treated as it should have been treated over the last, many years. It will be taken care of like the gold mine it is. Or at least a really good coal mine.

Today is Day#1… my goal is to be drug and alcohol free, alas, for 21 days.

I was also thinking of buying a bike and riding into the wind. Of course, I need a scarf. And music playing in the background.

We’ll see where it goes.